Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
only you would photoshop your dick
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
