yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize