One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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