All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
