im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
