help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
She's the barista slut.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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