I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
