do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
