it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
