Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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