no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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