the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
