And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
