Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
