Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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