you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
