my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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