Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
