Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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