Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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