our cab driver is having phone sex.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
