Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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