His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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