we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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