He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
