I didn't shave. On purpose
it was like his penis was on wheels.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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