I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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