I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize