To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
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