So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Randomize