are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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