Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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