Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
