jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize