I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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