It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Shitshow foam night was such a success
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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