Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
