one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Rumble strips road head = magical
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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