He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
