Where is the hickey?
one two three fourrrrnication!
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
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