How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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