Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
