Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
