Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
where am i from again
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
