Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize