we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
