like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize