and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
