sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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