Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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