I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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