All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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