I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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